Tim And Abbie 81:  Boxing Day Comes To An End

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Recovered from that little mid-day romp in the kitchen, Tim wondering if, in time, Abbie and he will play this way in every room of the house.  Tim and Abbie pull themselves together.Tim suggests that they clear out the clothes and things of his mother’s in the spare room so it can be redone.  With Abbie’s furniture to put in the room, he would like to have it repainted and ready for that soon.Going through the clothes, they decide which to donate and which are not really good enough to do that even.  To Abbie, and more so, Tim, it is a shame in some ways, to watch a life being divided into what might be acceptable and what isn’t anymore.Then Tim opens the smaller box he took from his mother’s closet.  It is about six by nine, with a cloth covering in a satin flower pattern.  Opening it, Tim sees it is full of letters.  He opens the first, which is addressed to him.  He gasps when he sees the date at the top of the message.  His mother wrote it a week before she died.  Why hadn’t she given it to him?Reading it brings tears to Tim’s eyes, followed by anger and confusion.  Abbie comes to Tim’s side and puts her arm around him.  She pulls Tim to her, kissing his head, as tears are free-flowing now.  Tim calms a bit, and Abbie asks him what is wrong?Tim hands her the letter as he continues to cry on Abbie’s shoulder.  She reads the letter, actually two times.My dearest boy, Tim,I know it is not long now before I am leaving this plane of life.  There are some things I want şişli escort you to know and understand.  Things I have kept hidden from you for so long.  First, I have loved you so much, you entering my life when I thought I was past ever having a child to care for and raise.I know I have seemed remote and perhaps hard at times.  It was all wanting you to be strong enough to face the world.  But I have learned that you hold your heart on your sleeve.  I have known all your fears and concerns, which has touched me more than you would ever know.I tried in my own fashion to help you accept your state in life.  Not be ashamed of something you had no choice in, but in that part, I know I have failed you.  But that is not what I need to try to explain to you, and hopefully, help you to find your own way in the world.Moving here to this house when you were four, while a larger place, it was rather dreary, and I did nothing to change it.  It fit my emotional feelings at the time.  Alone, with just you to care for, minus who had helped bring you into the world or my parents.I kept to myself and just cared for you and worked the jobs I could find. I had help from your father to get this house, and shortly after, I found a better job where I could be with you while I worked.Then one day, the woman living next to us entered our lives with such a ray of sunshine.  Not that she radiated it really, just such a positive force for me.  Over the next couple of years, Leslie was there helping şişli escort bayan all she could.  I was amazed that she would even notice me, besides showering me with attention.  At first, not that much, but it grew more and more.  Soon we three were a family, we would eat together often, and she was taking care of you when I couldn’t.Then something happened between us.  Leslie had broken up from her last romance about a year and a half after we got to know each other.  After a couple of years of us being just friends, things changed.Understand, when you were in bed, Leslie would tell me about her preference, and I was full of questions about what happens between two women and a multitude of questions about such relationships.  So, I was well informed, and my feelings for Leslie had been building.But it took time.  Until one afternoon, it happened.  You were at school, and the day was perfect for early fall.  I couldn’t help myself, while just talking about meaningless things, my desire to kiss Leslie, and more came to a head. And I knew she was longing for me.  One thing led to another.I leaned toward her and kissed her on the lips. We kissed and caressed each other for hours, it seemed.  It was the beginning.  I so wanted her as I never had anyone else, as she seemed to feel the same way.  But the next day, Les was gone.  For two days, she was not there.  I was going crazy.  I think it was during that time that I took you to see an inappropriate movie for mecidiyeköy escort you at the age you were.But she was back.  She explained that she had to make sure things were completely over and done with her former girlfriend so as not to interfere.  She was eager to teach me this new type of love and showing a genuine longing for me.  We did have to adjust our schedules to be able to be together when you were not around.  I did not want you to find out about this alternate lifestyle I had submitted myself too.As you grew, we could spend more and more time together, delighting each other fully.  And Les did still so help with you.  She was like a second mother to you.  Often actually better than me.We have been so in love, and as I see the end coming, and you being of an age to hopefully understand this, please, be kind to Les.  She will be mourning as much as you are.Know, while it was hard for me to show it.  I wanted you to grow up as a strong person, regardless of what faced you.  I do, and have since the day you were born, loved you unconditionally.  I am proud of you, Tim.Your motherAbbie is surprised at this revelation, but deep inside her since that first meeting and chat with Les realizes she did know.  Les referring to Cynthia as Cyn and her as Les.  It is somewhat amazing to her that over the years, Tim never picked up on it.  But then it seems his life was lived on the straight and narrow.What irony.Knowing Abbie has finished the letter, Tim lashes out, so angry, a side of him Abbie has never seen before.  He rants about his mother and Leslies deceit and almost meaningless garble.  Abbie realizes as tears stream down Tim’s face that this is mostly repressed grief from when his mother died.

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